The Great Divide I Had While Watching Tired | Violence

Disclaimer: It has come to my attention that this post has been popping up in google for the search term “Tired Violence stream.” If you came to this blog to stream Underoath’s new documentary for free you are in the wrong place. Go buy it like everyone else did you bums and support the band. I’ll even save you some trouble. Here is the link to purchase the documentary: http://tiredviolence.merchline.com/

Tired | Violence, a recently released documentary about the dreaded, yet timely end of post-hardcore & metalcore legend Underoath, had me at a constant emotional great divide when I watched it. I have been a fan of Underoath since the beginning and remember scraping what money I could to purchase their first documentary, 777, when they were still deemed to be, without a shadow of the doubt, a Christian metalcore band. The first divide I experienced with Underoath emerged when I first heard of them. At that the early stages of Underoath’s career, I was a malleable sophomore in high school who was in an identity crisis of her own. Looking for an ounce of truth and stability, I turned, like many young teens, to Christianity to find some solace and positive influence. Instead, over time, I found a much rather judgmental and callous group of youth surrounding me. It became more about the friends than it did the faith and that caused a divide to grow within my mind. On one hand, I felt like I belonged to something. On the other side of my mind, I felt like I was becoming part of something that I didn’t truly feel I was part of, that I truly didn’t believe; I was selling out to feel like I was part of something bigger. In order to feel like I wasn’t becoming a fraud, I turned my faith to music rather than directly to religion. At the forefront of my admiration was Underoath. I could listen to them without being marooned by my newly earned friends, but feel like I was still enjoying something for myself and not for the sake of others. That’s what their music gave to me at the time: a place to exist and not feel judged for being myself, simply a girl with good taste in music. Where I am going with this, is that I started out loving Underoath for reasons of faith  and ended up loving them for a far greater reason: music. The divide between my faith (in my early teenage years)  and my true self created within me a whole new appreciation for what it means to believe in something, and at the time it was much more palatable for me to believe in a band’s music (Underoath) rather than a figure (God) that I couldn’t fully connect with at the time. All of this background brings me to the final moment I watched Underoath on the big screen rather than stage call it quits in front of my eyes. You can hear about something, even read it, but seeing it happen brings a whole new sense of closure and finality. In Tired | Violence, many divides present themselves within the band. The great divisions that brought the true end to the band were their changes in ideals/beliefs and changes in priorities.

It was very evident throughout the course of the documentary that a shift in the band’s direction occurred. We could all tell early on through the music that Underoath was producing that something was changing within the neural network of the band. Faith became less evident and a sense of, not quite quarrel, but differing ideals were presenting themselves. The music as a whole was awesome and displayed continuity, but the message was clear that they weren’t seeing eye to eye on their beliefs. For some, like Tim, Chris, and James, this discontinuity seemed to deteriorate all the band had been saying for years previous; It felt wrong for them to say they were a Christian band when only some of the members were truly that way. It’s not that they looked down upon those who adapted new beliefs, it just became something that was no longer a truth about the band. Tim even went on record saying that he loves his friends regardless of their beliefs and that is, in his opinion, the most Christian thing he could do. I completely agree with him. The true nature of religion should be acceptance and kindness, not judgement. The divide I had is that I actually saw their opinions, even as an atheist, because they didn’t spew judgement and malice, but rather understanding and kindness, but I also see the other side’s view that Underoath should be about the music and not the title of the band. They were on the verge of something great. Their message was in their music, not their over-arching beliefs as a band.

A shift in priorities as well presented themselves. Some members now have families in the mix, such as James, Chris, and Tim. They found it difficult to justify being away from their family to do what they love. I see where they have had a shift in priorities, it is a no-brainer that family does come first and it is hard to be away from them on extended periods of time, especially when you have young children. Chris mentioned, in the documentary, a time when one of his idols told him not to become him, missing every birthday and not being there for his children because he was always on the road. This man’s words seemed to ingrain in Chris’ head, because he was one of the members who ultimately decided it was time to go home and be with his family rather than be out making music with his band of 10 plus years. Though I can see why certain members would have a shift in priorities, I also see why some of them would be in opposition to this. Spencer, in particular, knew what he signed up for. He was in the music business to be in the business for life. He didn’t spend years and years perfecting his craft to just give up on a whim. Underoath was their life for so many years and it all the sudden came to an end because a shift in priorities occurred. Yes, family is a big one, but the members and the significant others both knew what they signed up for. They signed up to live and breathe music and to all the sudden just say that isn’t what you signed up for anymore is kind of a injustice to the band. It’s how you make a living, how you project your soul into the world. At Underoath’s level, it’s no longer just a hobby you can quit; it’s a lifestyle you learn to adapt to even when times change. But, I do see both sides and that’s where the divide occurs for me. It’s hard to be away from your family and even can be unsettling at times, you miss a lot, and it can become a strain on relationships, but I also see how, in the music world, you have to make sacrifices to do what you love and that’s something that some member’s like Spencer are choosing to do. Ultimately, the members had to decide which world they wanted to be a part of.

As a whole, Underoath’s career was long and successful. They gave us many years of music to reflect upon and cherish. Though I am conflicted on how I feel about the shift in the band that ultimately brought them to the end, I do not resent them for it at all and no one should. Bands are made out of people and people change; that’s just life. Though it’s sad many years have finally come to end, Underoath gave us the closure we needed through their farewell shows, and for those of us who couldn’t attend, Tired | Violence. And there is a silver lining as always. Not all of the members called it quits in the music business. Spencer stayed true to his word and is continuing to make albums with his new band Sleepwave and it’s great to see him in his own element. Underoath was great while it lasted, but not everything can last forever; And that is perhaps is the greatest divide of all. But, like the band members, we have to chose to move on, not forget, just simply move on.